Pregnancy Journal - January 19, 2010

Last year at this time, your dad was in Kuwait.  He had been deployed for almost four months and was due to return home by the end of the month. We had already discussed trying to have a family when he got back. So when he got back we "started trying." Ten long months later I woke up with a sharp and terrible pain in my abdomen. I tried to shake it off and went to work anyway. A couple of days later the pain returned with an even greater vengeance and I nearly passed out at work. You father came to get me and took me straight to my OB. I was hopeful that it was some sort of pain associated with being pregnant, but didn't know why it would be so bad - so I was also nervous. 

The doctor told us that I was pregnant, but after a quick ultrasound we found out that it was an ectopic pregnancy. Basically the egg had been fertilized, but rather than implanting in my uterus it had gotten stuck in my fallopian tube and was growing there. It can be very dangerous if left untreated. The doctor said that there is a way to treat it with medication if it is caught early, but for me it was late enough that I had to have surgery. So within the span of three or four hours I went from being sick to discovering I was pregnant to finding out that I needed to have surgery and would not get to have this baby.

It was a very difficult time for me, but God certainly gave His grace. Through everything I trusted His sovereignity and knew that He was in control and that even though I didn't understand it all He had a reason for everything.

Of course the happenings of October did not change our minds about wanting to start a family. Imagine our happiness when on Thanksgiving Day we found out that we were going to have another chance at being parents! For some reason I had a feeling that I might be pregnant. Your dad and I spent Thanksgiving in Newton, Kansas with my parents and my grandmother. We drove home that afternoon and as soon as we got home I decided to take a pregnancy test - even though it was a couple of days early. I remember being thrilled and above all grateful when I saw the positive result on the test. I immediately found your dad and he could tell before I even said a word what I was so happy about. We shared a long hug (and a few tears on my part) and then left our home to go spend the evening with his family. It was VERY hard not to tell them our good news! But we knew we should wait until we had visited the doctor and were sure that you were safe and healthy.

Here is our ultrasound picture from December 8th, 2009.  I was five weeks pregnant.